I think I might have mentioned in one of my Five for Friday listy lists that I have reclaimed a corner of my bedroom to recreate a space for me to craft. More than that, really, it’s a space for me to be. And the reason I know it was both far overdue and hugely important to my sense of self, is that I cried after I sat down and finished my first project.
I looked around at what I had built, even though the space was still just temporary, and I cried. It felt so good to have that piece of me back. It was a necessary piece of myself that I had set aside while I was coupled up – because there was no time when I was running a household of six (and when one of those six was so special-needs), and because there was no space.
It used to be that I insisted on the girls sharing rooms to create that special bond between them. Then I used the guest room as my craft room where I spent the bulk of my free time. The girls had the front room for their playroom when they didn’t want to be in the family room, and I had the craft room. Then Jeff and the Xman moved in and I moved Gracie into my craft room. At first she was literally living in my craft room, but slowly I moved pieces out so she could, you know, put clothes away and stuff. And put up pictures. And generally make it her own. Eventually, so many things were put away in boxes that I couldn’t really scrap anywhere, even if the mood hit me to take over the dining room table for a weekend.
So when Jeff moved out and I was faced with the glory of Free Weekends(!) once again, I started rediscovering myself. I started running again. And I made this temporary space.
And a bunch of scrap pages. It was revelatory. An honest-to-god spiritual moment. I found such an important piece of myself – one I didn’t even realize was missing. A piece and a moment I needed so bad after these past two months. And it came at the right time. The horrible break-up. The sisters picking me up off the mat. Being here for the holidays. And now finding my rhythm. And, oh look! myself, too. I’m good. I’m okay.
So I answered the question I had about whether creating “fun” space in my bedroom was a good idea (how many experts tell you to only do sleepy type stuff in your bedroom if you have trouble sleeping?), because it was now an AWESOME idea. And necessary. I needed this.
So this happened.
Eventually I am going to replace the folding card table with an actual workspace. I’m thinking it will probs be my scrap desk that Gracie is using right now (so I can’t steal it from her). When I mentioned the idea to Gracie, who I was worried would claim it in the name of Spain, she was all “Good! I hate that desk.” So. Okay. Won’t be a problem. I want to splurge and get me a grown-up desk with a bigger work area, but
if when I have money to replace my bedroom set with something of a darker wood, I won’t know if my desk matches. And I don’t want to spend all of that money now on something that I won’t like later. Besides, Gracie’s desk has a bunch of very useful drawers for supplies.
Gracie’s happy with even the temporary arrangement. She loves having my scrapbook and craft shelves outta her way, because it opens her room waaaaay up.
Doesn’t it look nice? I mean, it needs a little work, but it’s coming along. I had suggested moving her drawers to that wall and the girl nearly took my head off. I’m rather keen on the corner of her dresser no longer scuffing a hole in the back of her bedroom door; she’s really into the idea of having a lounge area with her new bucket seat (hit gift from Christmas; woot woot), big pillows, and wifi Bose speakers (thank you, Santa). Also not pictured are her shoes, including my tall black boots that she’s appropriated. [Yes, we’ve moved into the delightful-yet-dreadful phase of same shoe sizes.]
So if I’m stealing back my desk that is now in Gracie’s room (on the opposite wall from her lounge area), her room will be really empty, so I proposed that I get her a desk for her birthday, and let her repaint her room. I love the purple and gray color scheme going on, but Gracie does not. She wants to do a silver/gold and royal blue – a scheme I could live with because it came out phenomenally well at Kim’s house. Gracie countered that she doesn’t really need a desk, she could live with just a small nightstand for her alarm clock and chapstick, etc. What she really wants is a small futon or couch for her room. There are a couple at Target that we’ve seen that are small enough that they might fit. I don’t know…
Even if they fit, am I going to give my tween a big head by giving her a couch in her room? Am I going to make my youngest feel even more left out when she can’t have a couch because I’m not getting rid of or storing the bed that I paid lots of money for, one that we need when we have guests and the girls have to bunk up. Oh, I can just see trouble coming. But if we do get Gracie the small futon, it’s additional sleeping space for when we have more guests! Two extra beds and a couch! Think of the parties I can throw! Ha!
Yes, we are all reclaiming our spaces. I will think up some fantastic makeover for Bee’s room, too. Just you wait. I feel like I can do anything right now!