Curse you, jelly beans!

Something was wrong. I spent much of yesterday afternoon and evening running down the hall because of…erm…stomach issues. Because of course I did – it seems like someone in my house has been sick every week since Christmas. Visions of norovirus danced through my head as I tried to keep the panic at bay. I did not want to have norovirus. (Compared to all the people who do, Katie?)

My boss was out of town for the week and I hate being sick when the boss-man isn’t here; even though I know no one is keeping tabs, I still feel like I’m taking advantage even though I’m genuinely sick. Norovirus would not be convenient.

Also, it’s spring break! The girlies are at their dad’s house for the week! I wanted to stay up late(ish) and enjoy the peace and quiet and recharge my batteries – not be sick. Being sick without having to also take care of my wee little charges is also nice, of course, but you know what’s even better? Not being sick. (Seriously? How did you not see that coming?)

And I had plans last night! I couldn’t be sick! Friends were in from out of town and we were all meeting for drinks. At a bar. At a time when, under normal un-Spring-Break-like conditions, I would normally be going to bed. Pretty sure norovirus would not be optimum conditions for margaritas. And darn it! I wanted margaritas! I wanted one bloody evening out with my friends like a grown-up! Didn’t I deserve a single night out, Universe?!

I was stewing under the weight of all these grumbly thoughts during the drive home from work when it hit me: Jelly beans.

I had been eating black jelly beans all day.

Oh, not by the fistful or anything. Just three here, three there. We’re talking, maybe 20 jelly beans – tops. The thing is, though, those black jelly beans, even though they’re the most delicious jelly beans in all the lands, and even though they can leach stress away very effectively, a certain memory from last Easter crept up on me. Something to do with black jelly beans having a certain side effect on my tummy.

Well, shoot.

But at least it wasn’t norovirus. As soon as I exerted some control, my stomach settled down, I got to go out with my friends, I slept like a baby, and I didn’t have to stress over calling in to ThePlaceThatShallNotBeNamed. All’s well that ends well.

I just wish I had taken that cursed bag of jelly beans out of my lunch bag so I wouldn’t be tempted.


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2 Responses to “Curse you, jelly beans!”

  1. Kathy Says:

    But black jelly beans are the most yummiest! They shouldn’t do that do you. Glad you got to go out and have fun though.

  2. darklldo Says:

    Would you believe they have caused me to have an irritated throat and gastric reflux?
    Yes, I was eating them on a regular basis, but hey! Black jelly beans?
    Apparently they can cause side effects 😦

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