Kids act out the darndest things.

This has been one of the those weeks for the ages. First I was down for the count with The Plague: Revisited. Then I we lost my our battle with my our tempers and we had an awfully good rendition of Celebrity Screamfest all up in here. Then there was our Close Encounter with the Santa Question. And then there was that little time the other night in which my childrens almost made me snortlaugh hot glue.

It was while I was in the middle of The Christmas Tree Made of Glass Ball Ornaments That Wasn’t – really, it was a horror and I promise you pics – but before The Santa Question. Really, it was a very interesting evening. The kids were off playing pretend with their dolls and I was bent over the ornaments trying to bend them to my will with the help o’ my good friend Hot Glue Gun. I was half listening to the girls’ play for there is nothing more amusing and I had sorted out that they were playing Dr. Quinn. I had determined this really because of this lovely little exchange:

Gracie staggers onto the kitchen floor, with a leg wound? of some kind.
Dr Quin! Quick! My leg is cut open! You can see my bone! A bear did it. I need you to help me!!!!
Bee, who happens to be jiggling a baby on her hip: I’m sorry, you’ll have to wait until the baby falls asleep.

That is one tough doctor. Too bad there isn’t another around with terms like that.

Later the girls must have decided that the baby hadn’t been born yet after all. How do I know, because I was once again bent over those ornaments, tediously applying hot glue to very slippery, non-porous surfaces and holding those stupid ornaments in place without schmearing anything when I heard:

Gracie: Push! Push!
Me, thinking: That’s odd…that sounds like…
Gracie: The baby is almost here! Puuuuush!

I whipped my head around and there’s Bee, on the ground, braced like she’s, well, pushing out a baby, and she has a lap blanket draped across her from the legs down. And, hey! Whaddya know! There’s Gracie taking a baby out from under the blanket! At least the baby was fully clothed – not sure how much more realism I could have taken just then! I asked the girls where on earth they had learned about such things and Gracie immediately piped up, pleased as punch, with “On Dr. Quinn!” Sigh. Yes, yes they had. I told the girls that having babies was a very natural part of life and I didn’t mind them playing like that at our house, but it was also a very private thing that parents want to teach to their own children when they were ready, so they shouldn’t play that with other children. And then I sent them back on their way.

Only my children would act out a natural birth scene and somehow I feel like it would only happen this week. Oh well. At least I handled it better than That Santa Thing!


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4 Responses to “Kids act out the darndest things.”

  1. Kathy Says:

    Oh dear! You have had quite a week. I must say, this made me laugh.

  2. Mary Says:

    OMG! Could that have been any funnier? 😀

  3. Gayle Says:

    Oh, Katie, that is so funny!

  4. Agent Torklepants Says:

    (i forgot to say this earlier) Ewwwwwwww! =0]

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