I’ll admit it: one of the ways I held myself together in the early post-divorce days was to eat comfort food and drink more than a glass of wine (or three) when I needed it. I didn’t let myself get too out of control – I’m a sucker for a budget – but I have to admit that I did ply myself with carbs and sweet, sweet alcohol.
Thankfully, I got my head screwed back on straight shortly thereafter and instead of burying my issues under food and drink, I started really looking at myself for the first time in years. Okay, well, really, I had been microscopically examining myself in and out of therapy for the year prior while I tried to figure out what to do with my marriage, but this was different. I didn’t have anyone to blame things on, hide behind, or complicate my image of self. The flip side is that I didn’t have anyone to lean on, either, and so I had to figure out how the heck to stand on my own again. Each small accomplishment brought a small measure of pride. Soon I was digging through my own b.s. at a furious pace, upending issue after issue and trying to find other things I could “fix” and new things I could love about myself.
During that crazy, topsy-turvy, adventurous, wild time of rediscovery, I found out I needed a few things to really feel like ME: reading was one of them. That was easy; I had always known reading=Katie, although I had forgotten it for a short while. My other find was extremely surprising – I loved getting working out. I had worked myself down from a size 14 to a size 10 after I had Bee. During that first year post-divorce, I worked myself down to a size 8. I jogged, I biked, I swam when I could, I walked – but mostly I used workout videos. I was a devoted Denise Austin follower until cable dropped her show. (I still have the last show on my DVR.) Then The Biggest Loser entered my life and I became a devoted Jillian fanatic. Finding Jillian has been amazing. She yells in my ear if I pick up a brownie. She goads me into going for runs. She harps and nags if I talk myself into skipping a workout. I’ve been Shred-ing for three weeks straight now and I’ve worked up from Level 1 Beginner to Level 1 Advanced (on all but the push-ups and jump-roping). And I. Feel. Fantastic!
I’m not saying if you don’t work out that you can’t or don’t love yourself. For some people it’s taking a few minutes to themselves or teaching themselves something new or splurging on something they deserve but never get (and I don’t mean justifying a purchase here, guys). Loving yourself – whatever it is – will resonate with you when you find it. For me, getting healthier – inside and out – has been a key to opening up a whole new level of happy.
And I love that some of my friends are finding their own happy, too. It seems like everywhere I turn these days, someone else is announcing that she’s found her own runner’s high. They’ve inspired me to really reflect on how grateful (and still – surprised!) I am that all this exercise crap has found a way into my life. I joke, but really – I am grateful. And inspired. Look at who I have keeping me honest, as if the voice of Jillian in my ears wasn’t enough: So if you’re one of them – if you’re on a Get Fit journey, let me know so I can add you to my brag sheet!
- My sister Kim started Jillian’s 30-Day Shred last week.
- Despite a minor setback this week, Margie over at soeurs du jour has been rocking the C25K.
- FireMom over at Stop, Drop, and Blog just began her C25K journey (I am so excited for her!).
- Crisanna just set a personal record at the 10k Zoo Run two weeks ago. (It was really her first 10k, but that still counts, right?!)
- Mrs. E over at Easy Street finished her C25K journey in time to race on St. Paddy’s Day (and her daughter kicked butt in the half-marathon. I’m pretty jealous.).
- My friend Jo has lost over 30 lbs in the past year – several times when I go to eat something I shouldn’t, I think about whether Jo would do it and I let go of the dessert. It’s tough when you work across the room from someone and you just know she’s going to turn the corner when you’re shoving it into your mouth. Sigh.
Have you been kicking butt lately? Invested in yourself? GOOD FOR YOU! Let me know so I can tell you how awesome you are and my pretty, pretty readers can heap you with praise. Because you totally deserve it. Then again – I bet you already knew that. Happy Love Thursday, everyone! Indulge in a little something for yourself today.
Tags: Exercise, fitness, health, Love Thursday
April 29, 2010 at 10:44 am |
Thanks for the mention today. I’m pretty amazed by your ability to look at who you are and where you are. And proud of you and for you, too. There is a power and strength that comes from physical fitness. Two years ago, I was right where I wanted to be. And I’m getting back to that healthy state again. It is fun to see the progress!! And yet– you know that!
See why I come by here? Inspiration and chuckles!!
April 29, 2010 at 12:25 pm |
I just want you to know that I have met @firemom in person. NEENER NEENER!
Yay for loving exercise! I do, too, although I still don’t manage to do it often enough. Soon we will get back to our regular bike-riding schedule. Soon. I hope.
April 29, 2010 at 6:53 pm |
Maybe I should start this CY2K thing…
April 29, 2010 at 9:01 pm |
you my dear katie are too modest. you are without question my inspiration. thumbs up to all of us.
April 30, 2010 at 9:36 am |
Katie, you are an inspiration! It’s so funny, I have had an exercise/happiness post swirling around in my head for the past week. I’ve been sticking to my exercise routine for a month or so now and feel so happy that I haven’t given in to laziness. A few times I have wanted to and it seems on those days you have written something about exercising and you’ve inspired me to keep at it! Thank you!
ps – I’ve got some old Denise Austin shows on VCR tape! I exercise to her DVD’s now!
May 4, 2010 at 2:14 pm |
Divorce is a motivator for sure. I know this first hand too. I have examined myself many times over in the past year and after losing 50lbs last year – I was starting to really like myself but as in the past – I got comfortable and lazy. I’ve let the pounds build up again and I’m not re-examining once again as the divorce process gears up.
So I’m joining that fitness craze because it does make you feel better about yourself and your body and I need that again. I hate the exercise itself but the benefits are worth it. You are an inspiration, kate! Keep sharing with us.
May 6, 2010 at 7:01 pm |
(Sorry, I’m behind from running and recovering from 2 half marathons in 15 days!) I am so impressed that you just keep going! Seeing somebody enjoy that runner’s high and love running so much makes me love running even more
I had a lousy race a couple of weeks ago (13.1 miles in New Orleans heat totally kicked my butt) so it took every bit of willpower I had to run a half marathon in Pittsburgh 15 days later where it rained through 12 of the 13.1 miles. And yet somehow I decided that I’m going to run a full marathon (my first ever!) in Vancouver BC next year. And even if I have to do it in a foot of snow, I will give it 110%. For the next year I will be running for me, so that I can accomplish something I NEVER thought I would be able to do.